(this is going to be in the sequel)
It was 12:36 in the afternoon of the 3rd of September- the day before Jen and I would be celebrating our 6th year anniversary, when I received a visit from Danny. I had just been contemplating, out loud, about an idea that I had involving the teachers and students across the country.
It was 12:36 in the afternoon of the 3rd of September- the day before Jen and I would be celebrating our 6th year anniversary, when I received a visit from Danny. I had just been contemplating, out loud, about an idea that I had involving the teachers and students across the country.
There is a picture
of my grandpa Lindner in his hunting clothes cleaning a deer he had shot. I
placed it there in view recently but it’s always been a special picture in my
daily view. He is smiling a wild smile and I wonder if it was me, the oldest
grandchild, taking the picture for him. I turned to Dan’s picture and asked if
he planted the idea in my head about the kids writing parodies about their
teachers- making a remark that if he was here we would help put this plan into
action. It felt like an idea he would be in on or help come up with. Looking at
his picture, I stated how he looked really good in it and how he probably hoped
that this would be the one photo that we chose to remembered him by. I returned
to my desk and began to work. A gooseflesh type feeling washed over me slightly
as his spirit manifested. A cold spot in the room- not a cold breeze of the
wind but a cold sensation washed the left side of my face. I asked if Danny was
there and the hair-raising feeling washed over me again. I asked more directly,
“Danny, is that you?” As I asked this I stood up and asked again- and there it
was again, a soft fuzzy electrical static type of sensation, and all I could see
was golden light in my consciousness. When I stated that I could feel him there
he wrapped his arms around my arms and ribcage and hugged me tighter and the
golden color got brighter, as if to say, “YES, ZACK, IT”S REALLY ME! It was the brightest thing I ever felt.
I
shouted, “I can feel you! I can feel you Danny! People don’t believe me that I
can sense this! I can feel you Danny!” and the constriction, again, became tighter
and it was a throbbing pulsing sensation. He hugged me again even tighter and I
began to cry in happiness. The pain in my heart felt so good- it was something that touched that orgiastic nerve we all share- like a full body orgasm more powerful than anything we have ever felt- or strive for as humans- sort of like when my
children were born.
I could feel him talking to me-applauding me for the work Jen and I did in
his names sake. I could feel him in my mind, his conversation- not the
annunciation but actual sense of his statements. I could also feel another
presence in the room but I was not able to identify who- a guiding angel maybe? I asked if it was James Bradshaw,
Jenny’s father. I asked a few times but got no answer.
He said he loved the office- the royal blue desk covering- the images that we kept of him on the walls- and the blown up images of his paintings we have celebrated. I sat down a bit choked up trying to regain myself but like we were going to talk in my office but he said, “Let’s go out into the light.” I said to him, “Yeah. Let’s go out and I’ll show you around,”- walking out the door towards the barn. I could feel him pulling me to the right, which led to the wood shed and stove and I began to give him the tour. We checked out my plants and then we went into the barn- or I went in. I could sense him saying that it was darkness in there. “Yeah, I’ll open up the door and turn on all of the lights. He was proud of my shop and he was impressed with the life I had thriving in there- the machinery I was responsible for as a husband and a parent, and the motorcycle I purchased for myself to memorialize my accomplishments involving having brought myself back to life from the streets. He asked me if I had any wine. I sensed it was part of a ceremony marking a spiritual act or ritual of some sort. I also burnt a fragrant herb.
His conversation had a pulsing vibration as well, his voice fading out and then becoming clearer- like there was interference. I am pretty sure it was something to do with the steel building we were in. Or maybe it was because I am just recently trying to grasp onto my own ability.
He said he loved the office- the royal blue desk covering- the images that we kept of him on the walls- and the blown up images of his paintings we have celebrated. I sat down a bit choked up trying to regain myself but like we were going to talk in my office but he said, “Let’s go out into the light.” I said to him, “Yeah. Let’s go out and I’ll show you around,”- walking out the door towards the barn. I could feel him pulling me to the right, which led to the wood shed and stove and I began to give him the tour. We checked out my plants and then we went into the barn- or I went in. I could sense him saying that it was darkness in there. “Yeah, I’ll open up the door and turn on all of the lights. He was proud of my shop and he was impressed with the life I had thriving in there- the machinery I was responsible for as a husband and a parent, and the motorcycle I purchased for myself to memorialize my accomplishments involving having brought myself back to life from the streets. He asked me if I had any wine. I sensed it was part of a ceremony marking a spiritual act or ritual of some sort. I also burnt a fragrant herb.
His conversation had a pulsing vibration as well, his voice fading out and then becoming clearer- like there was interference. I am pretty sure it was something to do with the steel building we were in. Or maybe it was because I am just recently trying to grasp onto my own ability.
While pointing out the different motorcycles
and stuff he happened to notice the stereo- HIS. I had it all set up in a
stereo cabinet that I had salvaged. He asked if any of our stuff was in it. I
turned it on and started the cd player- playing him a cd that was ours. He stood
near it for a few moments as we talked. I could tell where he was but I could
not physically see him. I could feel him looking at me, our eyes making
contact. I told him about the cd that Jen had produced, and then told him that we had met
her on EHarmony. He laughed about that. I told him about how she was spending
her own money entering our songs into contests before we even met in person,
and how she actually loved both of us in a way. At that point I told him that
through Jen falling in love with me with the added depth of the music to the
relationship, he had gotten everything he had always wanted. We laughed back
and forth about how she actually was in love with him and not me. We laughed good
and hard about that and how they could film it in Chicago. He said that he’d
try to steal her from me in the next life.
We went back out through the open garage bay
and stood in the sunlight. I could feel him hug me again, several more times.I asked him what it’s like there on the other
side. He said that there is lots of light- no darkness. And then I asked about
the music. He said, “The music sucks, the Hindi do all of the singing.” We
laughed and laughed about that. I am sure he meant it as a joke.
After some laughs and feeling the suns warmth
together, he told me it was time for him to go.
He asked me to walk him out to the end of the
driveway departure. After a few last words I felt the winds of change increase
and blast their weight and lift against me- I could feel him let me go. And
then there were two ravens coming from the east, soaring in the sky- the one
leading a way and the other following on the breeze. One turned for south, over
the treetops out of sight the other followed behind. Then one of them came back
north from the tree tops, soaring on a breeze you could see the Raven bring
it's wings in for sleekness and tuck it's head and neck for the speed- he was
saying "Watch this, watch me dive on the currents", and then a turn
back to catch back up towards the south... and with the tip of a wing he said,
“Goodbye”. And at that very moment I could feel myself letting him go, just as
he was trying to tell me that I needed to do.
As I returned up the driveway to my office in the lower level of the house, I pondered the feeling of all that had just happened trying to digest it’s magic, and the sight I had just seen when an angel spoke in my ear that you have to leave the door open to receive visits from the spirit world- all doors. They cannot come in to you if you are not open in every way. Alcohol, especially, destroys that energy.
As I returned up the driveway to my office in the lower level of the house, I pondered the feeling of all that had just happened trying to digest it’s magic, and the sight I had just seen when an angel spoke in my ear that you have to leave the door open to receive visits from the spirit world- all doors. They cannot come in to you if you are not open in every way. Alcohol, especially, destroys that energy.
With that thought I sit here reveling in the
moment I just experienced, I feel revitalized- empowered and at peace. Something
I had not felt before or at least for a long, long time. It felt like I just
saw family from long ago that stayed with me for some time in my life to share
space and catch up. I am pretty sure my grandpa Lindner was here too. It's just like him to be there observing and not say much. Our bonds were broken long ago- and because of that he needed to get Danny to help him. I am now refreshed and happy and I look forward to seeing
Danny and my grandparents again- again on the other side.
I am still trying to fully digest what exactly happened but today my horoscope said this:
Peace, Love, Care-
Zachery Scott Polk
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